Eulogy for Mark

We've spent the past two (very busy) days celebrating Mark's life. So many who loved him shared memories at last evening's visitation. Here were my thoughts...

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I met Mark twelve years ago when I had, what I didn’t even fully know at the time, a great honor - the honor of dating his son, Brad. Brad and I met while working together, becoming wonderful friends, ultimately dating and now married and the proud parents of our son Gavin and our angel Grace.

When Brad and I married in 2004, we began our search to buy a home. We searched and searched and searched the Grand Rapids area for just the right place. While searching, our hearts kept coming back to the neighborhood just down the road from Mark and Shirley. The neighborhood where we frequently took walks during our dating years, dreaming that one day we might live there. And that’s just what we did – bought a home … right up the street from my in-laws.

As you can imagine, everyone called us crazy for doing this. “Are you sure you want to live that close?” “Won’t they get on your nerves?” “You know they will be stopping by unannounced ALL of the time.” All of the typical comments people make about their in-laws. I’d kindly smile and refute all of the comments. I’m blessed with the unordinary. I’d tell them, “you don’t know my in-laws; I love them as much as my own family.”

It has been an absolute joy living just a bike ride away from Mark and Shirley. We’ll miss those unannounced visits from Mark, who would joyfully arrive on his bike to have a beer with Brad and me. To talk and laugh with us. To watch the weekend’s football game. To help us with our latest construction or garden project. To give his grandson an airplane ride.

We still catch ourselves looking out the window, expecting to see Mark peddling around our neighborhood with his recognizable riding swagger, huge smile on his face. I’m sure he’s riding that bike in heaven right now.

It’s amazing to know that so many of you gathered today have had similar experiences with Mark. Your stories are equally as much a testament to the life Mark lived. So many people gathered here today and over the past several weeks, as Mark faced his final days, that I could say I’m amazed at how many people love him. But to be honest, I’m not amazed. I’m not amazed because I know the person Mark was – and how could you not absolutely love that person. It’s no shock to me that so many people adore him as much as I do.

Brad and I have been blessed to be molded in our marriage by watching from a true example of what marriage is. Mark and Shirley’s love and devotion to each other is like no other I’ve ever seen. They are each other’s best friend. I’m blessed every day with the son they raised to be just like them.

The day that we learned that Mark would have only days left with us, Brad and I stopped by the cemetery to see our daughter Grace. We visit Grace nearly every day, but our visit with her that day felt different. I told her that her grandpa would be joining her in heaven soon. That she could show him around when he arrived. While we were sitting with her, I had this incredible sense of calm come over me. It was as though she was there telling me it would all be okay.

None of this is the way we planned or, frankly, the way we want it to be. But it is, none-the-less, comforting to some degree to know that Grace and Mark have each other. She is one lucky girl to have him there with her - to hold her, to love her….to teach her how to golf or how to bait a hook. How to fix that darn pontoon at the cottage. To just be with her.

Mark, thank you for all that you have brought to my life. We love you and we will miss you every day. I can’t wait to see you again someday!